Finishing Finale

I meant to blog about this last week, but never really got to click the "publish post" button.

3rd May 2009: Multipurpose Sports Hall (MPSH) 5

Today was a special day.
It was not only the last day of my life exams, it marked the end of my academic life in NUS as a bioengineering undergraduate. Physiology II (PY1106) had the honour to be THE PAPER for Kelvin.

Of course, I figured that my final paper in NUS should be a walk in the park.

1. Multiple Choice Questions (MCQ)
MCQ examinations are what students would kill for, as opposed to those lengthy essay or calculations-galore papers. Put it simply, how bad could it turn out?

Even a monkey trained to shade one oval per line would be able to score around 20%.

2. 60 MCQs for 2 hours
2 minutes per question?! Gahhhh. A pure insult.
Judging that a good number of questions are based upon simple recall of facts, it shouldn't take more than 30 seconds.

3. Year 1 kids.
HAHA. This is the "old bird" speaking man... What do all those Dentistry, Pharmarcy and Nursing freshies know?

4. Me = 2 Exams only.
Since the Chamber Singers II small group singing test had long passed, I effectively had the whole study break to prepare a miserly of 2 papers.
(Of course, how effectively I made use of the time is pretty questionable.)

I could list a few more reasons, but you get my idea...
.
.
.

So Kelvin strolled in to the examination hall, to table 89. "Let's end this with a smile!", he thought confidently.

Listening to Dr. Sanjay Khanna recite the same list of instructions for the last time, he cranked his head to see the digital clock strike "1700".

"The time is 5PM. This is a 2hour paper... You may begin."

*rustle of papers*

Kelvin's eyes settle on the first question... And his heart skipped a beat.
"Nah... They probably reserved the most difficult questions for the first part," he manages to convince himself.

After eliminating the obviously wrong choices, Kelvin attempts to wring out the best answer. And like all other previous papers, he marked a tick on the left hand side of the question to indicate that the question deserves a second look.

The second question.

"Ah ha! You're not going to play mind games with me!" Kelvin triumphantly guesses that the second question will be as difficult as the first one. He knows that all attempts to break him down psychologically would fail.

And yup, he makes another customary tick at the left of question two.

The third question.
"Yes! The questions are still... difficult?" Kelvin negotiates the question valiantly.

And another tick to the left hand side.

The fifth question.
"... ..."

*Two more ticks*

Halfway through the paper, Kelvin soon observes that the "ticks" were fast losing its significance. "I should start marking out questions that I know instead..." he ponders to himself cruelly.

Time flew by in a blur as an epic battle for survival unfolded before his eyes. No prizes for guessing who had the upper hand.

As a coup de grâce, irritating kids started leaving the hall 15 minutes before the end of the paper. Arghhh.

Let me tell you, it was a pretty gruesome sight at table 89.

While the final year students were declaring that they had finally finished, Kelvin was simply... finished.